A God-Fearing Husband
BY HOMER G. LINDSAY, JR.
Matthew 7:24; Ephesians 5:22 MOST MARRIAGES are murdered by inches. They are not destroyed overnight. The ones that are, are the rare exceptions. And just as the erosion of a marriage takes time, the rebuilding of a weakened marriage also takes time. So, don't get discouraged. You can have a wonderful home, but it does take work.
Every marriage has problems at times. None are completely free from difficulties or problems. Jesus says in Matthew 7:24-27:
Therefore whosoever heareth these sayings of mine, and doeth them, I will liken him unto a wise man, which built his house upon a rock. And the rain descended, and the floods came, and the winds blew, and beat upon that house; and it fell not: for it was founded upon a rock. And every one that heareth these sayings of mine, and doeth them not, shall be likened unto a foolish man, which built his house upon the sand. And the rain descended, and the floods came, and the winds blew, and beat upon that house; and it fell: and great was the fall of it.The reason for the deterioration of Christian homes is disobedience to the Word of God. God established the home as His first institution. If you adhere to the Word of God, your home will be strong and there will be love and happiness in it.Authority in the home. In Ephesians 5:22, God says, "Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord"; and in I Corinthians 11:3, "the head of the woman is man."
Hence, a husband becomes the head of his home because the wife has submitted to the authority of God's word and allowed him to be the head of the home. He does not become the head of the home because he is better or wiser in God's eyes than his wife.
Likewise, God does not regard the wife as a lesser person than her husband. In fact, a wife that submits to the word of God shows spiritual maturity. She realizes that God in His wisdom has set forth a line of authority for the home. A good home situation cannot have two generals, lest you are going to have war. The husband is assigned the responsibility of being the head of the household.
Spiritual problem. Now, if you have a wife who will not submit, don't demand her to do so. You have a spiritual problem and you have to take it to the Lord.
Any wife who will not submit to her husband has to get right with God. Until she gets right with God, she's not going to submit, and you certainly can't make her. If you try to make her, you will only have a mess on your hands. You have to go to the Lord; wait on Him. You have to pray for her.
And as the high priest of the home, you have to set an example of being a God-fearing husband. Let me show you what kind of man such a husband is.
1. A Man of Commitment.
A godly husband is a man who is committed to his homecommitted to his wife, and committed to his children. Bible love is commitment. It is not some emotion or fantasy. Every home needs a husband who is dedicated to advancing the welfare of his wife and all other members of the family.2. A Man of Convictions.
I have heard my dad say many times that a man who has no convictions is nothing. A man needs convictions, but the convictions must come from the word of God. There are certain things that are right, and there are certain things that are wrong. To meet his God-given responsibilities for being the head of his household, the god-fearing husband needs to find out from the Bible what is right and what is wrong, what are truths and what are lies.3. A Man with Courage.
It's good to have convictions, but if a man doesn't have courage, he won't stand for his convictions. In a world where few people have any sense of values, there are probably situations where you need to stand alone because you have convictions and because of your convictions.In these situations, you need to have the courage to resist worldly pressures. Otherwise, you will have to compromise your view of the word of God.
4. A Man of Character.
A man needs to be truthful and honest. A home cannot be built on lies or deceits; it can only be built on trust. The husband should never give his wife any reason not to trust him and vice versa.In this connection, God says in Ephesians 5:3, "Among you there must not be even a hint of sexual immorality, or of any kind of impurity, or of greed, because these are improper for God's holy people." Once you have established true trust within the family, that trust will see you through many troublesome times.
5. A Man of Self-Discipline.
A man must be able to discipline himself. For example, every Christian needs a quiet timea quality time every day with God. A man with no discipline will not do that. If the husband and wife both begin their day by reading the Bible and praying to God, it'll make all the difference in the world.You will need a time of devotions together as well. As the head of the household, leading the family in scripture reading, praying and having a time of devotions together should help bring your family closer to God as well as to one another.
Going to church every Sunday should be a vital part of your weekly activities. Let your children know that church is as important a part of the week as school is. Never think of not going to church. This takes discipline.
6. A Man of Discipline.
As the head of the household, the godly man must be prepared to discipline his children when they have gone out of line. Too many parents today have failed to do that.But the Bible says in Hebrews 12 that when our fathers discipline us, we respect them for it. Conversely, it says in Proverbs 13:24, "He who spares the rod hates his son, but he who loves him is careful to discipline him."
7. A Man Who Cares.
Even as Christ is sensitive to what's going on in His church, God's man is sensitive to what's going on in his home. He is sensitive to the needs of his wife and other family members. He may not always be able to meet those needs, but he tries to. He may not always be able to solve his wife's problems, but it's a comfort to her when she knows that at least he cares. oDr. Homer G. Lindsay, Jr. is pastor of First Baptist Church, 124 W. Ashley Street, Jacksonville, FL 32202.